I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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