i think my tv is drunk
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
