But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
