these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I have demons in me.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
You pole danced in your parka.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Randomize
