69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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