didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I can feel your judgement through the phone
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
