im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Ketchup is God's man juice
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize
