i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Randomize