Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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