you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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