she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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