Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Randomize
