Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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