sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
