She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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