I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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