You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
