Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
