I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
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