Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
