I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
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Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
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We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
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