Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
he fucked my hip out of place.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Found the puke drawer
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Randomize
