"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
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