Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
My life is pants optional.
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