I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Randomize
