Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
