you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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