"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize