new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
