My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
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