i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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