i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
NoShamevember. You game?
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Randomize