He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
