He asked me if I "almost moaned"
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Is it penis luge time yet?
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
