I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
