Dual....:-)
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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