Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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