I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
