HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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