You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
