Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Randomize
