WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Randomize
