nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
