i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Randomize
