I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Randomize
