btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
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I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
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dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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