Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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