Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
