i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Randomize
