Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
