Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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